Stay Heartless, Is Way Better

Currently do nothing now, so I decided to check this blog out. So many things to say, actually. So many..

Well, my life was ruined a little bit by thinking too much bad thoughts. Been crying for a whole three days. Umm, not whole but everynight I tried myself to sleep. Looked so fine though on the internet, may call it Twitter but I am not. Still laughed & did some jokes, but that were just my effort to forget what I've been through and again, just to be seen I am so fucking fine.

My friends through this killing pain was just Tumblr (for God's sake, I'm so thankful for having Tumblr account). Reblogged all the trash-posts, and I am just feeling sorry for spamming your dashboard, I didn't mean to. And after all of those fucking spamming thing, I just felt relieved..

Had talked about things that matters to me, but I just got the 2 up to 8 words answers or barely even speaking. Tried fucking hard to get myself right, but I couldnt. At the end. Kept talking about the way I feel but you keep on giving the 2 up to 8 words answers. And I ended up like crying baby. It's hurting that much.

Todavía no estoy bien, hasta ahora. Todavía me sigo preguntando. y si usted piensaque ahora estoy feliz, no soy..

Mungkin lo berfikiran lo tidak begitu, tapi di pikiran gue lo seperti. Mungkin gue yang berlebihan, tapi gue hanya butuh lo peka. Bilang kalau semuanya oke-oke aja dalam dua-delapan kata itu bikin semuanya tampak tidak oke seperti yang lo bilang. Gue bukan nya tidak menerima kondisi lo yang katanya kayak gitu, tapi gue hanya butuh penjelasan yang melegakan gue. Gimana gue bisa percaya omongan lo kalo lo hanya begitu dengan dunia, tp tidak sama gue. Dari sisi apa gue harus percaya?

So this is my last time crying myself, I want to stay heartlessssssssssss.. yap, semoga masa gue jadi cewek cengeng cukup sampai disini aja. Semoga..

“How many times have you tried to talk to someone about something that matters to you, tried to get them to see it the way you do? And how many of those times have ended with you feeling bitter, resenting them for making you feel like your pain doesn’t have any substance after all?"